Friends and Family

Coping with the addict/alcoholic

Time-tested coping strategies for those that love and care about the addict or alcoholic.
What are the 5 skills you need:

• 1. Get honest with yourself
  Really take a look at what is happening in your life on a daily basis. See how the weeks are progressing. Ask yourself, "Is this what I want?"
  2. Take responsibility for only yourself.
  Whether we are dealing with our children, spouses, parents or friends, you cannot control their actions. Nothing you do can make them ingest their drug of choice. Nothing you can do will make them quit. Understand now that the number one symptom of Alcoholism and Drug Addiction is denial of the disease.
  3. They act and you react - predicatability
  Here are a few:
  They pass out on the couch - you clean up the mess they left behind
  They should help with the bills, house cleaning, child care - but you do it all
  If they are a black out drinker – They embarass you, or much worse and you accept thier appology and tell yourself it will never happen again.
  They tell you I love you - Only to get drunk again, or cuss you into the dirt.
  They argue with you on thier RIGHT to drink or use, and you still go to the grocery store for them, or let them drive, or allow them to keep it rather than have another argument.
• They take no responsibility for anything, and you continue to take all the responsibility to fix everything.
• 4. Learn to detach from your emotions, and see things as they are.
• When we take the emotionalism out of our actions, we have a greater impact. It sounds cold, but when we take a candid look at a situation and simply decide to not get overly emotional, we can state our decision calmly
  and walk away. Getting drawn into their emotionalism is equivalent in many ways as getting drawn into the temper tantrum of a small child whose balloon has flown away. The fact is you are dealing with an adult; they have the ability to make their own decisions and handle their own responsibilities. Unacceptable behavior is exactly that, unacceptable.
• 5. Your boundaries
  Detachment only has impact and value as far as your boundaries
  are maintained. You are the one that needs to respect your boundaries.
  You are the one that keeps changing them. Empty threats are worthless.
  Set your boundaries, and stick to them.
  

The truth is one of every six families in the United States is affected by addiction. Constantly reacting to the alcoholic/addict is like living in the eye of a hurricane. For brief periods there is calm, then the eye moves, and you are back in the chaos of the storm. You can make a difference.

Why Coaching works

Recovery Coaching works with you to motivate you to keep going forward. We understand where you are at, and where they are at. The only successful work that has ever been done with an alcoholic or addict is from those that know the disease on an intimate level. We are your best ally when living with a drunk or a drug addict. It is the behavior we try to change, not the symptom. Getting sober is achievable for many. STAYING SOBER is where the problem is. Stop trying something, and when it does not work immediately, move on to something new. Let us show you how you can and will change the life of not only your addict/alcoholic, but everyone else that they have taken as hostage.
check out our main website at Motivate 4 Success

CLick for a pdf of our brochure

Who we are:

Motivate 4 Success is a Recovery Coaching group. Recovery Coaching works with you to discover your needs now, and help you develop a plan for success in the future. We know what is happening from experience, and education. Our programs and procedures are developed by Alcoholics, Addicts, and the family and friends.

When change is a must, we help you do it. Real help where you need it, where you live. We focus on today and build for tomorrow. Click Here - More Info.